It's always been you
by Yanebaby08
Summary: Bella left with Edward and his family after their wedding. She left Jacob behind heartbroken but now she's back 6 years later.


**This is my first attemp at a writing a story. I'm not so good at it but be easy on me. This is a one shot because I don't really trust myself to do a whole story. I hope you enjoy and please review.**

**Disclaimer: twilight world is all Stephenie Meyer's I had nothing to do with it.**

* * *

It has been six years since I left Forks. I was now putting mine and Jay Jay's luggage in the trunk of Charlie's Cherokee jeep. I was going back to Forks to spend Christmas and New Years and to have my father meet and spend some time with my one year old, Jaden.

"Ma, ma, ma, ma" I heard Jaden say as he came up to hug my leg.

"He doesn't like me very much Bell" Charlie pouted. I had to laugh at his expression.

"Dad, he has to get used to you. He doesn't know you" I said while picking up my son. He looks nothing like me. His skin is tan and he has black hair. All he has are my eyes.

"Yeah and when he gets used to me, you'll leave and he'll forget me." I knew what he was getting at.

"Dad, let's not do this now. We should really get going." We got in the car and were on our way to Forks. I gave Jaden his bottle and he was asleep in no time. Charlie was never really good at making conversation, so it left me a lot of time to think.

The truth is I have been dreading coming back to Forks. I've been living with this emptiness inside of me for these past six years. Jaden filled most of it but I still had a part of me that needed filling. The only person that could fill it was the one who was always there for me when I needed him, who brought me out to the light after being in the darkness for so long, the one who was my own personal sun, Jacob.

Since that was the situation, that part of me was not going to get filled. The last time I saw Jacob we didn't end on good terms.

**FLASHBACK**

_It was yet another rainy day in Forks. I was on my way to Jake's house to apologize for Edward sending him an invitation to the wedding. It's not that I didn't want him to go; it would mean the world to me if he did, but his feelings for me would make it hard for him. I love Jacob, I really do, but my love for Edward overpowers my love for Jacob._

_I pulled up to the familiar red house where I spent my days when Edward had left me. I was surprised that Jacob hadn't come out when he heard my truck. Maybe he wasn't here. I got out and went to check the garage where he usually was._

_There was my sun. His back facing the door, and head in his hands._

"_Hey Jake" I said as I walked towards him._

"_Stop!" I froze mid-step as he said this._

"_W-what's wrong Jake?" he didn't want to see me. I knew he probably wouldn't, but I still had to try. I had to at least see him one last time._

"_What's wrong? You're really asking me that?" he turned around and I noticed he had the invitation in his hands. His face made my heart sink. He looked tortured and there were traces of tears on his cheeks._

"_Jacob I'm sorry I-"he put his hand up to let me know he didn't want to hear my apologies._

"_You give me hope by kissing me back and telling me you love me and then you just crush it all with this stupid invitation!" _

"_I didn't send it, Ed-"cut off yet again._

"_It doesn't matter who the hell sent it Bella! It still means that you're going to go through with this and get married to that bloodsucker! It means that my love for you isn't enough and will never be enough to keep you here ALIVE!" he let out a sob which made the tears that I was trying to hold back, fall._

"_Jacob you know I love him, I need him, and I can't be without him!" I didn't know how else to make him see that Edward was "it" for me. He was who I wanted to spend forever with._

"_you said you love me too!" he protested_

"_But-"_

"_But it's not enough, right? You can be without me but not without him. You don't need me. I was only useful when he was gone" I was choked up, I couldn't say anything and sobs escaped me. I lowered my head as more tears started to fall. Everything was quiet for a moment and all that could be heard was the rain. I risked looking up and he was staring at me with disgust. He was closing and opening his hands trying to control himself. He then turned his back on me._

"_Leave Bella" he said _

"_Jake, please I-"_

"_LEAVE NOW!" he said it with so much force that it scared me. I took one last look at the back of who used to be my best friend, my sun, and ran out into the rain sobbing harder and harder as I went._

**END FLASHBACK**

He was wrong and I know that now. I do need him, I always have, and my love for him is stronger than what I felt for Edward. I just wish I would've realized it then.

"Bella, we're here" I hadn't realized that I had fallen asleep until I heard Charlie.

"It looks just as I remember it" I said as I looked at the white house.

"The only thing that has changed is that Sue is living here now. She's staying down in La Push for tonight" as he talked about her I noticed the sparkle in his eye.

I took a still sleeping Jaden out of the car while Charlie got the bags.

"You should probably sleep the rest of the night. You seem pretty tired." Charlie said

"Yeah dad I think I will. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight" I went and gave him a kiss. As I was getting ready to go up the stairs I heard him clear his throat, meaning he was going to say something else.

"Bell, Christmas eve dinner is going to be down in La Push at Emily's, with everyone" I tensed; I really wasn't ready for that. Six years and I'm still not ready to face Jacob.

"O-okay dad" I'll just have to endure it.

After taking a shower I went back to my room, which was different because it was made into a guest room, and laid down next to my son. I was so tired that I fell asleep right away.

* * *

I woke up to coughing. I looked to the window and it seemed early. I felt small hot hands touch me, I jumped and I looked to my right to see my little boy start coughing.

"aww Jay Jay, are you sick?" he just nodded.

My son has never been sick before and I was worried. I really didn't know how to handle it so I just settled with making him soup for now. I lifted him up and took him to the bathroom to brush our teeth.

He felt really hot and kept coughing. We went downstairs to the kitchen and I saw that it was 7:50. I sat Jaden on a chair and got started right away on the soup. All of a sudden he starts crying.

"Jay Jay, what's wrong baby?" he took his head in his hands and started crying harder. "Your head hurts?" he nodded. I filled his bottle with milk, took him in my arms, and rocked him.

"What's wrong with him?" I heard Charlie ask.

"He got sick out of nowhere dad. He's never been sick before. I'm making him some soup." I said with a shaky voice.

"He's going to be okay, he's probably used to sunny California and the change of weather made him sick." He was right, it was just the weather. I guess I should've planned this trip better.

* * *

It was four o'clock; I was sitting on the couch with Jaden covered in a blanket on my lap watching SpongeBob. I was glad that his fever had gone down a little bit but his nose was still stuffy and he was coughing a lot.

"Bella, are you going to get ready to go to the dinner? We have to be there by six."

"I think I should stay here with Jaden. It's starting to drizzle and I don't want to take him out like that." As much as I hated to see my baby sick, it saved me from having to go to the dinner.

"I guess you're right Bella, I'm sure everyone will understand. I'll bring you some food and I'll see if Emily has some medicine for Jaden." Charlie said as he put on his coat. "Bye Jaden. Feel better"

"Bye ampa" Jaden said in a hoarse voice. Charlie had stayed with us all day and Jaden was starting to like him.

* * *

It was eight and it was raining really hard. Jaden had just fallen asleep on the couch. I was sitting on the kitchen table when I heard the Halloween movie's music.

"Hello Maria"

"_Isabella, why didn't you call me as soon as you arrived? I was starting to get worried"_

Maria is Jaden's grandmother from his father's side. She loves to nag me and she has such an annoying voice.

"I'm sorry Maria but we went straight to sleep as soon as we got here and today I've been busy taking care of Jaden. He's sick"

"_How could you let him get sick? I told he would. Why don't you ever listen to me? You should've just had your father come down here for Christmas…"_

She kept going and going and going. When this woman gets started she just doesn't stop.

"_Isabella, you are a bad mother! You-"_

"You're right Maria, you're always right! I am a bad mother!" she always told me that.

"She doesn't know what she's talking about" I froze. I could recognize that voice anywhere. He set down a bag on the table. I'm assuming it was the food. "There's some food and ibuprofen that Emily sent for your son" I was scared to turn around. What was I going to say to him?

"_Isabella, are you listening to me?"_

"Maria, I really can't do this right now" I hung up on her and turned around to find nobody there. I got to the door as it was shutting. I went outside in time to get to Jacob.

"Jacob, wait!" he froze mid-step but didn't turn around. It was still raining hard and he was soaked. "Thank you for bringing the food and medicine" he didn't say anything. I walked down the porch steps into the rain. "Can we talk?"

"There's nothing to talk about Bella" his voice was hard as he said this.

"Jacob, I'm sorry. You were right I-"

"Six years Bella and you still haven't changed. All you do is apologize like if that's going to change things." He turned to look at me, his jaw was clenched, his face full of anger. Tears started filling my eyes.

"Jake, I-"

"Forget it Bella. I don't want to hear what you have to say." Just like that he started walking towards his car.

"I LOVE YOU JACOB! I DO NEED YOU!" he was in front of me in a second.

"You never loved me or needed me enough to stay here. You were always after that stupid bloodsucker of yours. You always loved him and needed him more than me! And now you want to come and tell me that I'm the one you needed and loved more. Did he leave you is that why?" he said through clenched teeth. The rain was coming down harder.

"No, I left him" It came out as a whisper.

"What?" He looked taken aback by that.

"_You don't know what you got till it's gone. _I learned the hard way that that saying is true."

"What exactly are you trying to say Bella?"

"When I left everything was fine at first. Then as the months went by I started to feel empty. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I thought I had everything I wanted but I was wrong. Sometimes I didn't even want to look at Edward or have him touch me. I cried myself to sleep lots of nights and Edward wouldn't be able to be in the same room as me because it would break his heart. Alice said once that she couldn't see my future. After being with Edward for two years I decided to leave so I wouldn't break his heart anymore." He was looking at me with a soft expression. "I thought about you every day I was gone. There wasn't a day where I wouldn't think about you. I needed to be with you"

"That's a lie! If you needed to be with me you would've came back!"

"I couldn't come back Jacob, I-"

"Why the hell not?"

"Because since I came here everything revolved around Edward. When he left it was all about you. I wanted to do things on my own for once. I wanted to prove that I didn't need anybody to help me through. I needed to grow up." The rain was calming down.

"You say all that but you ended up pregnant by some other guy who now you have to be committed to because you have his kid. Yet you expect me to believe that I was the one you wanted to be with and needed." He turned around again to leave.

"I GOT DRUNK! HE LOOKED LIKE YOU! HE DIED IN A CAR ACCIDENT 6 MONTHS AGO! I NAMED MY SON JADEN JACOB!" I screamed after him. "THERE'S NOBODY ELSE FOR ME JAKE! I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU! IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU!" I turned and ran up the porch stairs. I stopped at the door and put my forehead against it. I had told him everything and that's all that mattered. I was going to cry and let everything out right now and then move on and live my life for my son.

"As hard as I try I can't turn away from you. You've always been "it" for me Bella since I first saw you. I never stopped loving you and I never will" His lips were by my ear. He put his chin on my shoulder and hugged me from the back. I turned around in his embrace to look at him.

"It's been the same for me it just took me longer to realize." He smiled _my_ smile. The one that I missed so much.

"And you're the one who was in AP. This totally gives me more years." I knew he was going to say something smart.

"I have a kid so I'm still older"

"I think you should have another one that's actually mine this time"

I grinned at him, stood on my toes, and crashed my lips to his. It was the most amazing kiss. I forgot how good it felt to kiss him. I now knew that I would never leave his side again. I was finally where I belong.


End file.
